03 July, 2006

The Other Ex

One thing that my last ex taught me was that it is possible to be friends with an ex. I had always feared that it wasn't possible with all of the lingering emotions, but it's worked out well for us.

So, with that in mind, I decided that it was time to look up my ex in Tulsa. When I left 3 or so years ago, he made me promise that he would get to see me again. I know that it really hurt him when I left, but I hoped that after 3 years, time would have healed those wounds and we would be able to talk.

Cooincidentally, I had to make a last-minute trip to Oklahoma for a funeral. So, I extended the trip for a couple of days and made my way to Tulsa. It took a while, but I was able to track him down and we spent about 6-7 hours catching up with our respective lives.

Please excuse me if I leave you hanging here a bit, but for those of you I've told this story to, you can attest that continuing on would surely make for uncomfortable (and a bit unbelievable) reading. Let me just sumarize by saying that his life has been lived hard and very different from mine. It was a very strange and eye-opening experience. I returned to Houston wishing that I had just left well enough alone.

The goal of this post is to convey that not all good intentions go as planned. (duh) Some things are best left unknown. In my head, I knew that I should have just left him alone and not tried to re-establish communication, but I just had to try.

The only thing that lets me feel a little good about this is that I got an email from his mom a few days later saying that he started talking to them again and he sounded happier than he had in the past year or two. Maybe this is where the emotional tables got turned, and I was the one burned this time.

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